Coffee Substitutes For When The S.H.T.F.

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[00:02:16] All right, welcome back to the Survival and Basic Badass Podcast. Today, well, we're gonna talk about coffee

[00:02:29] and I don't know a lot of us I think need coffee to start the day. Yeah it's pretty standard.

[00:02:38] Yeah. Pretty standard for most Americans. I'm one of them you know. Right people are like oh you

[00:02:42] know it seems like you have a bottomless coffee cup in your podcast because you're going for it and

[00:02:48] it's usually because about well because I talk so much that after I get to a point it's like ice cold

[00:02:54] and so get these tiny sips you know like little bit to just kind of get there. Right,

[00:03:01] yeah so we're gonna kind of I did some research and there's a lot of substitutes out there.

[00:03:08] I didn't say great substitutes. I'm saying ways that you can kind of fill that void in your heart

[00:03:16] with some warm beverage that will hopefully make life a little bit easier in the apocalypse

[00:03:24] but we have some creative alternatives and I will say I think there is an option for everybody

[00:03:32] here. Like I have a lot on the table where there's gonna be a way that you can fill this void and

[00:03:40] you know make everything a little bit better. Right. First off, I do want to say we're talking

[00:03:46] about like finding plants in the garden and in nature and if you can't recognize plants or

[00:03:55] know what the right one is that's you know that's kind of on you it's up to you to

[00:04:01] kind of figure out somebody who's going to show you how or learn on your own and put some effort

[00:04:06] or if you're the kind of guy that likes to take risks you could you know figure that shit out

[00:04:12] on your own. Maybe talk to a doctor if these are good ideas you know I don't know. These aren't

[00:04:18] necessarily my you know not the end all right. I'm not saying that you know this is absolutely

[00:04:26] great and whatever I'm saying these are things that people are doing and you might want to consider

[00:04:31] yourself. Right right it's like don't go out mushroom hunting if you don't know what the hell

[00:04:35] you're doing you know. It could end badly. Right. I mean even Kevin who has been known to throw

[00:04:42] out some reckless advice would say you know hey you know kind of call before you dig right.

[00:04:49] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah that's resulted in a lot of bad situations and

[00:04:56] in my life where I had to show up and somebody is like I don't know I was digging this hole and

[00:05:01] it's just filling up with water now. I don't know what's going on. I just wanted to put new plants

[00:05:05] here. I just want plants you can't deny me that. Yeah I actually have a quote from Ben Franklin.

[00:05:14] Among the numerous luxuries of the table coffee may be considered as one of the most valuable.

[00:05:22] It excites cheerfulness without intoxication and the pleasing flow of spirits which on occasions

[00:05:31] is never followed by sadness, anger or debility. So I'm just saying throughout American history

[00:05:41] coffee's been held with high esteem. Yeah I mean coffee is very much an American beverage in the

[00:05:49] sense that you know we swore off tea. The British aren't drinking as much coffee as we are you know

[00:05:56] most places in the world drink more tea than they drink coffee except for Italy and some places in

[00:06:03] the Middle East and you know a few countries in Europe drink more coffee than tea but

[00:06:09] for the most part it's a tea world and you know we're just living in it. We're living in a tea

[00:06:15] world so all right let's uh let's kind of jump into it. So first one that kind of is pretty popular

[00:06:26] in the whole prepper world kind of thing is chicory root. Right chicory grows really well in the

[00:06:37] northeast Kentucky north and southeast actually and basically is like a wildflower you see on the

[00:06:47] side of the highway kind of thing is where people always have it. It's basically considered like a

[00:06:53] weed. Yeah I run that over with my lawn mower. Right right it's a purple flower that looks pretty

[00:07:00] awesome actually and it's very invasive so once it starts growing it does kind of spread everywhere

[00:07:08] but nobody ever complained about having too much coffee growing in their yard so I don't think that

[00:07:14] would be a big problem. One of the things to keep in mind is uh are they spraying all kinds of

[00:07:21] pesticides and stuff on wherever you're picking your your wildflowers or whatever something to

[00:07:27] think about. It's just flavoring. A lot of these things they they have to make this claimer of too

[00:07:34] much uh too much of anything is kind of bad for you. They're like oh you know this can be toxic if

[00:07:46] you have you know tons and tons of it so whatever keep that in mind all right just you know be

[00:07:52] aware that a lot of these plants you know are meant to be in moderation but that's it. Find something

[00:08:01] that seems like you can grow it you know where it is and try it out and do some research on your own

[00:08:07] and kind of expand it but basically chicory you dig it up you take up the root and the root's

[00:08:13] kind of like a carrot or a tuber kind of thing um it's not orange like a carrot it's kind of

[00:08:20] brown but basically you chop it up small a lot of these root seeds everything you're going to chop it up

[00:08:28] and roast it um if you were doing it in the oven you'd do like 350 for like 30 minutes

[00:08:36] then you grind it into a powder and you cook it just like coffee right um obviously you know in an

[00:08:42] outdoor survival preparer situation whatever you're probably not using your regular oven

[00:08:48] right you know whatever you can figure out it turns out when I get temperature in the times

[00:08:55] it's so you have an idea of what you're looking at you know you guys have to use a little you know

[00:09:02] something on your own a little creativity all right we'll say that all right so chicory

[00:09:08] that's probably my number one uh if you guys have ever been in New Orleans uh there's that

[00:09:13] cafe du mom is the the trendy uh coffee place and their big thing is that it's like half coffee

[00:09:20] half chicory people really like the unique they say bloody flavor right right right but it's uh yeah so

[00:09:30] it's low in caffeine though so you're not going to get the same kind of boost that you're going

[00:09:34] to get for coffee yeah no caffeine so almost all these unless I tell you otherwise you're not

[00:09:40] going to get caffeine from it so this is taste like a warm brown comforting liquid that's going

[00:09:48] to remind you of home how about that um next would be dandelion coffee uh right dandelion

[00:09:56] is an interesting plant because it was kind of like um it used to be like a standard that you had

[00:10:03] dandelions in in your lawn yeah and then uh you know and then they came out with uh herbicides

[00:10:09] that killed wide you know broadleaf plants and then they're like yeah dandelions are weeds you really

[00:10:14] should kill those all off because they're shit killed off dandelions just like clover we gotta get

[00:10:20] clover's no good no you'd be better off if you add your entire lawn of clover and dandelions

[00:10:26] than you would with grass because grass doesn't do shit now dandelion coffee as well as there's

[00:10:32] another one called that the sothistle all right um both of those you're going to go for the root

[00:10:39] now dandelion and sothistle look about the same um sothistle is like the skinnier kind of um oh hang

[00:10:51] on uh I have a picture that maybe I can show somebody um anyway sothistle is like taller dandelions

[00:11:02] basically you know they're like five foot and a half but the flower basically looks the same

[00:11:09] either way those you're taking the root and you're chopping it up dandelions and sothistle

[00:11:16] right now you're gonna roast that like like coffee too right like what I read was 250 degrees for

[00:11:24] about two hours so slow and low uh you know it's done when it's uh a dark and fragrant whatever

[00:11:31] okay all right so that now dandelions are are interesting because you can eat the leaves right

[00:11:38] you can use the the roots for for a coffee substitute and you can use the flower for

[00:11:45] dandelion wine so it's like uh all inclusive you know I don't know what else you'd want um

[00:11:54] next uh you guys have maybe seen on uh youtube and stuff there's uh survival lily uh I think

[00:12:00] she's gonna be a prepper camp actually okay just put that out there because I'm gonna be a

[00:12:05] prepper camp truck's gonna be a prepper camp be a prepper camp everybody can be a prepper camp

[00:12:10] if they want right but I was watching one of her videos where she did acorn coffee

[00:12:16] everybody knows how to find acorns all right so okay all over the place they're all over the place

[00:12:22] maybe just rob a squirrel now you you've heard about eating acorns that they have the tannins in

[00:12:28] it that are kind of bitter and poisonous that's right so she has a video on youtube if you want

[00:12:35] to search out acorn coffee but basically you gather up the acorns you peel the skin

[00:12:42] you chop it crush it it basically looks like uh you chop it till it's like crush nuts at mcdonald's

[00:12:48] the little baggy that size yep um and you put it in a pot with water you boil it you dump it out

[00:12:59] and you basically do this about five or six times where you boil it and dump it out you basically

[00:13:06] want to taste one you know at about five times and make sure they're not bitter um right the bitter

[00:13:14] is is the tannins you know that's and again it's toxic it's gonna give you a belly ache I guess if

[00:13:21] you didn't boil them at all you know you eat acorns you're gonna get sick unless you get rid of the tannins

[00:13:27] right you do that you roast them uh you roast the nuts and you end up like kind of grinding it up like

[00:13:36] mush and you can actually eat that mush or the paste but you could also uh you could also go ahead

[00:13:44] and uh you know dry it out grind it up or sorry and then make coffee out of it

[00:13:50] um out of the like it's basically you take the mush and you kind of brew it brew right through it

[00:13:58] you don't even need to roast it at that point you know once you after all the boiling so

[00:14:04] saying a corn coffee something you you know right right let's talk about a couple of things that do

[00:14:12] have caffeine oh I like caffeine now if you're a prepper and you're really prepping your best bet

[00:14:21] is to get a bunch of uh coffee beans and store so that uh when when shit goes down

[00:14:28] you can actually just pull the cat the the coffee beans out and uh grind them up and you got coffee

[00:14:35] that's simple easy easy fix right but there's other stuff you can store that's that's just as easy

[00:14:42] to store or even actually easier to store um things like uh uh black tea and green tea they have caffeine

[00:14:49] in them um it's it's awfully british you know i'm not a big fan of the of the brits as far as their

[00:14:58] lifestyle don't drink coffee like i i mean don't get me wrong i know british people that i like

[00:15:05] i like most british people i just don't like i just don't like the life they live you know

[00:15:10] you know fucking beans and toast for breakfast beans get out of here man that's disgusting sounded

[00:15:16] but whatever do what you want um so black tea green tea and you know you can actually make a cup of tea

[00:15:24] with uh less leaves than than coffee grounds it's kind of easy to store you know what i mean you have

[00:15:31] a big pack of uh of dried leaves and and you can store that indefinitely basically

[00:15:37] yeah but i feel like a tea bag full of stuff if it's already pre-done is about equal to an

[00:15:43] instant pack of coffee yeah well you're probably right right why not go for the gold um the only

[00:15:50] thing i would say about uh uh british people is i like you lory but only when he's talking with

[00:15:56] an american accent i'm pretending to be an american so i mean there's that yeah that would be house

[00:16:03] for those of you that don't know and okay but i now uh another thing that has caffeine obviously is

[00:16:12] soda a lot of people um you know buy the the cases the 12 packs and stick them in their garage and

[00:16:18] and whatever you have fat kids and you want to make sure that they get their their daily quote

[00:16:24] of sugar um you can stockpile all sorts of soda that you know doesn't have to be refrigerated

[00:16:32] refrigerated it'll last forever you know just stick it in the in the closet in the cabinet that's fine

[00:16:38] whatever um be careful though because not all not all soda has caffeine in it obviously

[00:16:45] you know sprite and i think diet coke does diet coke not have caffeine or is that just

[00:16:51] caffeine free coke i don't know either way who's doing that who's who's drinking the diet sodas

[00:17:00] i don't know um when i was in uh south america when i i was in argentina for for uh i spent a summer

[00:17:10] in argentina when i was younger they drank herb amate which is uh it's like a tea so impressive

[00:17:17] yeah it's like a tea um mate is it's like a um it's a leaf that they grind up now coffee a

[00:17:25] cup of coffee has 95 milligrams of caffeine in it um black tea has 47 green tea has 40 so it's you know

[00:17:35] caffeine free coffee has about 40 grams of of caffeine in it it's not it's not free of caffeine

[00:17:42] it just has less less caffeine less so you know if you're a less than kind of person

[00:17:50] black tea might be right for you right herb mate what's that nothing

[00:17:57] herb amate has has just as much as as coffee does though it's a you know a lot of caffeine in there

[00:18:04] and it's uh it doesn't taste bad it's not not bad at all and when i was in argentina they don't

[00:18:09] drink coffee they don't drink tea they drink mate and basically what they do is they make it like uh

[00:18:16] um they put it in a cup the mate leaves fill it with hot water and then they drink it out of a

[00:18:22] straw that has like um you know like holes on the bottom of it like little little holes so it filters

[00:18:29] it out you know so it's like um you know it's it's it's decent it's not bad and and you can store

[00:18:35] that just like you can store uh tea and it's not very expensive it's uh you know it's pretty decent

[00:18:43] so just another option for you you can um you can fill up with uh herb amate you can fill up with the

[00:18:51] black tea you can fill up with green tea but i really recommend if you're a coffee drinker

[00:18:57] stockpile your coffee beans you know coffee beans will last a lot longer than than ground coffee

[00:19:02] and you know ground coffee as long as you can pair it has uh it's not cheap but uh has the big

[00:19:09] five pound bags that are sealed um again i don't know how long they're gonna last but i bet you crappy

[00:19:16] coffee is better than no coffee yeah my crappy i just mean if it's gone old you know right whatever

[00:19:24] the vacuum sealed they'll probably last a long time uh you guys know my patriots apply they have

[00:19:29] a ton that you know they sell but honestly it's it's not cheap but i think right now it's like

[00:19:36] 720 servings is like 95 bucks but i gotta say that sounds like you and the wife each having a cup

[00:19:44] of coffee for another year for 95 bucks no mind you one cup of coffee in the morning but when

[00:19:51] you're down to zero one sounds pretty good you know i know you're like why drink more than one cup

[00:19:56] of coffee in the morning i know i sure as hell do um but you know that that might be something

[00:20:02] another thing you might want to consider that stores well and is great for the apocalypse

[00:20:08] and that would be whiskey um whiskey is a great alternative to coffee i'm just saying

[00:20:17] i do know locally we have some kind of crappy coffee called a wrist or sorry crappy whiskey

[00:20:25] called a wrist or crap whiskey yeah this is like you're you know Kevin i can't even use the

[00:20:33] derogatory terms maybe why no i don't know but this stuff is about six dollars a bottle here

[00:20:43] i tasted it it's pretty freaking good and i'm like i'll tell you what when whenever

[00:20:48] something is labeled as a wrist or crap you can guarantee that no wrist or crap has ever drank it

[00:20:55] but i checked it out and i was like oh so this is a bad and so now whatever i buy a bottle of liquor

[00:21:02] i buy like two of those to just throw in the cart and even it out yeah and then i have like cases of

[00:21:09] it you know stocked up in uh in the the barn you know up in the loft or whatever and i'm like

[00:21:16] my barn doesn't really have a loft but it is in the bar but i mean if you have um you know if

[00:21:21] you have haven't had whiskey in in weeks and you're uh you know you've been living with the lights out

[00:21:30] and uh you know pooping in a bucket a little bit of whiskey that isn't even doesn't even have to be

[00:21:35] good it goes a long way now back to your theme of uh of caffeine um there is only one plant

[00:21:46] native to north america well to the us that uh is caffeine producing and uh and kicks ass

[00:21:56] and it is called yapan holly now i could be saying it wrong uh it's y a u p o n holly uh it

[00:22:08] predominantly grows in the southeast i know people have it in texas um basically the the

[00:22:15] berries are bad they're like red they're like poison they're no but you want to bake the leaves

[00:22:23] and then you know dry them out filter it in water it ends up making a sweet green tea

[00:22:32] that uh is got caffeine in it and could be living your best life with sweet green tea

[00:22:40] you bring all the girls over have morning sweet tea i don't know why i think that women drink tea and

[00:22:47] men don't because i'm an america that's kind of the standard i feel like a lot of people here that

[00:22:52] drink coffee they're listening to this podcast their wife only drinks take my wife only drinks

[00:22:58] take she doesn't drink yeah drink coffee i gotta say i know quite a few uh girls out there that

[00:23:03] drink coffee though so i don't know where we're going with this but um but i've always said

[00:23:08] you know i like my coffee like i like my women black and bitter oh i thought you were gonna say

[00:23:13] ground up and in the freezer whatever whatever you knew there was going to be a coffee joke in this

[00:23:20] episode right it had to be had to be there i'm only getting warmed up man oh whoa so there's

[00:23:26] another plant called curly dock uh i pick this a lot because i'm i'm picking it for my rabbits

[00:23:33] because they eat it um the whole plant is pretty much out edible where you have a big broad leaf

[00:23:41] and again this is like a weed in your yard that you see all the time uh and the stem is edible

[00:23:47] people eat these all the time um i do have but this one you're not making it out of the leaf

[00:23:54] for the root this one is actually out of the seeds right um so i got another picture of it

[00:24:03] it's get gross like tall kind of burr like seeds you know towards the fall you know as the season

[00:24:10] goes on and these this is another one where you want to eat it in moderation uh but again

[00:24:18] you would roast the seeds uh 350 for about an hour it's nutty and fragrant um and basically you know

[00:24:28] you make like another coffee substitute and it's not that bad is what i'm told i haven't had that one

[00:24:34] i've had a few of these i've had acorn coffee i've had um the uh the chicory but uh the others

[00:24:44] i haven't been down that road i've had stuff with dandelion but not dandelion coffee

[00:24:50] kevin is always bragging about dandelion wine is that the i've never made it but i you know i

[00:24:55] looked it up it's not that hard to make you know it's not and wine sounds like something better than

[00:25:00] water that's right that's right right maybe i have a problem um there's another one called

[00:25:11] the kentucky coffee tree um the kentucky coffee tree is like a uh legume tree so legumes are you

[00:25:21] know seeds with pods with seeds in it kind of thing right they uh turns out they grow in kentucky

[00:25:27] but they grow you know in the southeast um they have pods like this and you end up they're like

[00:25:36] purplish and uh and seeds in it you basically take the beans roast them and make coffee out of that

[00:25:45] it's a big kind of looks like a locus tree um they're pretty awesome though it's something you

[00:25:51] might want to look into if you're in the southeast see what kind of you know what these

[00:25:56] look like i haven't tried that one i don't know but again it's another option that you can

[00:26:02] kind of look into and check out but i don't know what else you got on the list Kevin anything

[00:26:09] uh well i got a couple of things that we've got kombucha which i've never drank and it sounds terrible

[00:26:16] seems like some sort of a weird health drink that's got a little bit of alcohol in it and it

[00:26:20] tastes like vinegar i'm not really sure because i never drank it is that a thing we can make

[00:26:24] ourselves or is that like is that just the the crap left over in the compost pile i think

[00:26:30] that's basically what it is that's what it looks like so yeah it's what it looks like and it's what

[00:26:36] it smells like i've never drank it because i'm not some dirty hippie but whatever um hot chocolate

[00:26:44] uh you get those little packs you know you can get those little powdered packs

[00:26:48] get a whole box of them for a couple of bucks and stick them in the back of your cabinet

[00:26:53] kids love it it's got a little bit of caffeine so hot chocolate's about 10 milligrams again

[00:26:58] coffee's 95 milligrams so you got a good ways to go but if you just eat chocolate

[00:27:06] an ounce of chocolate has um 12 milligrams so ounce by ounce chocolate has more than coffee

[00:27:17] does but i mean drinking eating eight ounces of chocolate is pretty kind of gross you know

[00:27:23] yeah whatever pig out if you want to but uh you know it's the same thing as if you're making

[00:27:28] chocolate in your backyard it's not like um you know this is something that you would have to store

[00:27:33] and storing chocolate is a lot more difficult than storing you know coffee or green tea

[00:27:40] and rats love chocolate man there's there's actually a limit on how much rat hair can be

[00:27:46] in chocolate to sell you know what i mean because because you're never gonna keep all the rat hair

[00:27:53] out of chocolate when you're making it so it has to be a limited amount you know you can only have

[00:27:58] this much rat hair in your in your chocolate when you when you're producing it so keep that in

[00:28:03] mind when you're eating chocolate that there's ground up rat hair in there too so kevin you're

[00:28:08] not making my morning go better no no grabbing the fresh cup of java and no i'm not thinking

[00:28:16] about rat hair no i'm here if you have cocoa people are gonna want to be your friend right

[00:28:22] they haven't had sugar they're hating the world and they haven't had chocolate and all of a sudden

[00:28:29] you break out the packs of cocoa it's kind of like i used to store a uh a number 10 can of peaches

[00:28:37] uh like in the apocalypse everyone's gonna be like peaches and i'm gonna be like yep

[00:28:43] and all the you know everybody's gonna want to come hang out with me right and the wife was like

[00:28:49] we're not keeping these damn peaches anymore and she doesn't even stop and let them throw them out

[00:28:54] i hear that a lot yeah it's a bad world we live in i i uh so i got this uh super disgusting um

[00:29:04] uh friend that gave me these uh that sounds right it was it was canned boiled peanuts so

[00:29:14] it's their whole peanuts with the shell and everything and eat the whole thing these boiled

[00:29:19] peanuts you eat the shell the whole the whole thing i've had these cans for like three years

[00:29:25] and every once in a while look at them and be like nah that that seems too fucking gross one

[00:29:31] of these days i'll have to do like a uh a short video of me opening them up and trying them out

[00:29:36] but it looks super disgusting and you know i'm gross i i do gross shit i'll eat them now what are the

[00:29:45] what are the is it tamales i think that come in the corn husk yep and you're not supposed to

[00:29:52] eat the corn husk now i've never had a tamale i i know you hear about them all the time i'd

[00:29:58] never had one until the other day and i open it up and i'm like what the hell and the guy hands me

[00:30:03] like a little baggy a hot sauce kind of thing it's like green whatever and it's got the like paste

[00:30:10] inside and he's like oh you don't eat the husk no i didn't start i was just opening it i'm like

[00:30:14] i don't know i don't know and uh but yeah other people were like i've been eating the husk

[00:30:20] all this time so i just thought i'd put that out there and i'm like really that's not what you

[00:30:25] want to do i love lived in southern california for a while and that was a big thing there's always

[00:30:31] some lady going around with a with a car or had her trunk open was just selling tamales out of the back

[00:30:37] a friend of mine that i worked with brought in tamales he was a mexican dude brought in tamales

[00:30:42] and uh gave me one for you know lunch time and i was eating it was shrimp tamales which is

[00:30:48] okay fancy right yeah and then i started eating and i realized it was not as fancy as i thought

[00:30:53] it was because it was the whole shrimp the legs the shell everything was in there and i was like oh this

[00:31:00] this is gross like meeting the shells and and he's like you're so white man only white privilege

[00:31:08] no no dude that's gross i don't care what you say i'm not eating the whole shell of the crustation

[00:31:15] that you got in your baked in your your cornbread here it's disgusting but apparently you know i'm a white

[00:31:22] person and that's just uh one of my handicaps when it comes to eating tomorrow we're limited you know

[00:31:28] it's what it's in first world problems yeah yeah different now a lot of you are asking well why can't

[00:31:36] i just grow coffee for the apocalypse like right cut it off at the you know at the chase here and

[00:31:44] whatever but it turns out coffee dies coffee plants at 55 degrees so if you're ever going to see below

[00:31:53] 55 it's not going to work out for you now why you can grow coffee portarico yes basically you want

[00:32:01] to be on the equator so maybe that's an option maybe you just say you know what screw this i'm

[00:32:06] moving to belize i'm just gonna live somewhere i don't even know if you can grow coffee and

[00:32:11] believe i don't know if it's quite but i assume if the other place yeah now you're probably good

[00:32:17] so you know whatever that's an option um and if coffee is that important to you then maybe that's

[00:32:23] the right answer for you i'm just saying yeah a little sign out to mollies but it was a new

[00:32:32] experience for me i thought well i thought i knew because i go to taco bell all the time right

[00:32:37] and you know what i thought taco bell was selling actual mexican food but it's not like i know all

[00:32:42] about it and then somebody you know from and again not from mexico but from somewhere in south america

[00:32:50] he told me what country he was from but you know how it is you're like yeah oh yeah that one yeah

[00:32:55] and i knew it they all kind of make sure all the same i'm like i don't know i still can't figure

[00:33:00] out how many countries there are in north america it's very hard for me yeah that's confusing because

[00:33:05] it's not free that's what you learn in school yeah i thought it was three but there's like six of them

[00:33:10] that are part of north america so whatever that means i don't even know what's happening

[00:33:14] but anyway is panaman north america i don't even know who knows who knows i know panama city

[00:33:21] florida yeah that's the panam I know they call that the uh the redneck riviera panama city if

[00:33:31] you're a redneck that's where you go for vacations you know yeah a lot of terrible strip clubs in

[00:33:38] panama city i got stories but you have a story this is a family friendly show yeah because we always

[00:33:46] talk about the family things on the survival and basic badass podcast right right um it sure it turns out

[00:33:54] we should be telling people to like and subscribe to our channel i'm told that if we don't do that

[00:33:59] that's and you're actually supposed to mention that at the beginning of the episode and not

[00:34:03] the beginning or not the end not the end you're supposed to like subscribe people or maybe a tenth

[00:34:09] of the people at the end of the episode that you do in the beginning right well i know when i'm

[00:34:14] listening to a podcast and and the hosts start rambling on about random shit i turn that shit off

[00:34:18] and move on to the next one so kevin that hurts that i mean that's my favorite part of this

[00:34:24] the show when we're like what i'm doing it but um now another substitute for uh see they would have

[00:34:32] missed this one yeah they wouldn't miss this one so this is uh this is something i actually grow in my

[00:34:37] yard oh um it's a lemon balm oh now you can make tea out of that and it's reasonable it you know

[00:34:46] taste decent i actually have a jar here of dried lemon balm the problem is that it if you plant

[00:34:55] it it's gonna grow you you can dig it up and throw it in the trash and the next year it's

[00:35:00] gonna grow there again it's like the root system is is so uh integrated in the ground it just keeps

[00:35:07] growing and growing and taking over it's like mint you know what i mean you plant it and then the next

[00:35:12] thing you know your whole fucking garden is is mint right so but you know i can't get rid of it

[00:35:18] so i just cut it all up and dry it out and and use it it's it's not too bad it's decent you

[00:35:24] that's kind of like the garden garlic patches at my yard we we were like oh we'll plant garlic here

[00:35:30] this year and then over there next year and then so it's here and over there right next year it's

[00:35:37] because right you dig it up you think you get all the garlic and then the next year you're like oh

[00:35:41] look there's like 20 garlic plants over there right right you can't get you can't get rid of it but

[00:35:46] yeah you know those are actually good plants to grow because it's easy to grow you know mint

[00:35:51] if you're if you're ever bought a plant a mint don't plant it near anything else that you're trying

[00:35:57] to grow find some part of the yard that's just whatever grass leaves whatever and just plant

[00:36:03] it there and let it spread out and you'll have as much mint as you need in in a year or two

[00:36:08] i know that i've i never come close to using all the mint that i grow it just no no mojito

[00:36:15] parties at your house i didn't know i have them oh you do i drink mint jula i'd like i i

[00:36:23] have way more mint flavored stuff than i that i need and it's uh it never it never use all of it

[00:36:31] it just grows and takes over everything around it so it you know it's the same thing a lot of um

[00:36:38] a lot of herbs are like that like oregano will take over time will take over everything

[00:36:43] rosemary if you're not careful with those with those um you know certain herbs

[00:36:48] you know i a lot of them i just plant pots because it's not you know it's not worthwhile

[00:36:53] that's legal in north care in new york right right also somebody had mentioned in the comments

[00:37:01] if you can't get access to coffee cocaine is really good really and you can take cocaine

[00:37:08] right uh so you take powdered cocaine and that can also be a pick me up right yeah it is a pick

[00:37:15] me up yeah it's great for the morning get get your day started with a little bit of cocaine

[00:37:20] and you can take cocaine and uh you mix it in with baking soda put a little bit of water in there

[00:37:26] and boil it until it you know is a crust you know it's a crystal you scrape it up

[00:37:33] that is crack rock oh so that's how you make crack and then you can smoke crack and crack

[00:37:40] has the benefit of being uh 10 times more addictive than regular cocaine yeah so you know if you

[00:37:48] really want to make some life choices that that are going to go downhill fast start with crack

[00:37:55] okay you know i would recommend heroin that's got the same kind of life altering uh

[00:38:01] so you're saying poppy and we can make tea and everyone will feel better in the morning

[00:38:09] that's right that's right because you won't sleep all night Kevin that's an ugly road we do not

[00:38:18] promote drug use on this podcast we only talk about good happy things right right good healthy

[00:38:26] smart positive decisions and i will say if family friendly decision or a little bit of cocaine

[00:38:33] you will be having all sorts of positive uh ideas and and decisions and you will everybody you're

[00:38:39] talking to you're gonna be like well we're gonna start a business together and uh that's never

[00:38:44] gonna pan out but i mean it's you know actually when it turns to crack yeah now things go downhill

[00:38:52] but you know i will tell you this though crackheads if you're ever having like a problem like you need

[00:38:58] to find something cheap you need to get something this or that find a crackhead they will go steal

[00:39:02] that shit right now and bring it right back to you for ten dollars new tv find a crackhead

[00:39:08] they will get one they'll just go to the old folks home and just take the tv off the out of

[00:39:12] the out of the you know the rec room and bring it right back to your house and now

[00:39:18] some candy bars or something to distract them and they're good to go huh uh i would time was uh

[00:39:23] was hanging out my my uh front walk and i was uh lived in an apartment complex and i was kind of

[00:39:29] playing a guitar but i couldn't get the tuning right and there's a crackhead there sure it's

[00:39:35] coming by i said uh i said i don't know where i could get one of these i'm not you know i don't

[00:39:40] have a lot of money but i was looking for a guitar tuner dude was back in two hours five

[00:39:46] dollars that's serious that's a commitment right i mean they're working dude they're working for their

[00:39:52] money and they will they will come through no matter what because they've got all that crack energy

[00:39:58] you know crack energy you wish you had that kind of staying power and uh you know can do attitude

[00:40:06] right exactly exactly and i was thinking maybe i need to do that maybe i need to if i need to

[00:40:11] focus you know uh when it's legal it's called Adderall so um okay you can find that tons of places

[00:40:19] the government makes i mean government approves it pharmaceutical companies are making it and they're

[00:40:24] pumping it out all over the place go find some Adderall and you can make the same sort of

[00:40:29] terrible life decisions as if you're doing crack just a delicate dance just food for thought

[00:40:36] food for thought all right so pretty much that's the excitement that you guys need to know about

[00:40:42] this week i would say make sure you like subscribe leave comments uh questions and concerns

[00:40:49] email us at prepping bad ass at gmail.com show ideas things you want to hear about

[00:40:56] things you think kevin should do to make his life better maybe some recommendations on better

[00:41:02] life choices yeah i mean if you want to send me some crack you know email us at prepping bad

[00:41:08] ass g uh at gmail.com i'll give you my address you can just ship it right out ship it right out

[00:41:14] UPS guy it ends bad um so that's what i can offer you with that i would say stay safe and

[00:41:23] we'll talk to you guys next week